You Call That Extortin'?!

So Letterman was scandalized by a CBS producer, who wanted to extort $2 million bold dollars from the late night host. Wow! Guts, without them Glory ain't as confident a follower. In this case, where there's Guts but no Glory you just walk around with your intestines swinging out your shirt.

David Letterman had to confess to his wife, his sexual affairs so she'd hear it from him. Otherwise, he'd have to pay up to a one, Robert "Joe" Halderman for a golden silence. Letterman had only married his wife a couple of months back but they had been together now for more than 20 years.

Usually I don't care about this kind of thing. Its just gossip to anyone who isn't personally involved. But upon reading an online article I came across the following:

"Shargel said it was unlikely that Halderman would have sought to extort Letterman by taking a $2 million check, because that is not how extortionists normally operate."

Gerald Shargel is Robert "Joe" Halderman's attorney. His statement is priceless, "...because that is not how extortionists normally operate." The fact that this man is questioning the credibility of Letterman's claim by indication of irregularity, by which the crime was executed, is borderline if not fully crossover-ridiculous!

"...How extortionists normally operate."

How they "normally" operate! How do they "normally" operate, Gerry? May I later apologize for Letterman's insensitivity? How dare he accuse your client of such novice and unprofessional styles of extortionism? But in the meantime, could you explain to us in what nature this specific extortion, was abnormal? Because clearly asking for money in exchange for information withheld, isn't enough. No, and of course what would I or Letterman know? We're obviously not extortionists, we're obviously crying wolf, when its just a dog. Will you bring forward for us, Gerry, qualified professionals who will demonstrate for us the correct, "normal" procedure for extorting an individual. Will you clear that for us, Gerry-boy?

I hope America's Next Top Extortionists (ANTE) pay close attention to these proceedings as they may discover that they too may be doing something wrong.